A Great Guy

My husband and I just returned home from a vacation. It was a wonderful getaway, planned to coincide with the wedding of the youngest son of my husband’s long-time friend. The family has three boys and my husband has celebrated each of their births, graduations and many moments along the way. We were excited to be able to share this milestone with treasured friends. We were also anxious to reconnect with the middle son who is married with two children of his own. He lives a great distance from us now and I haven’t seen him in many years. As long as I have known him, he has been a thoughtful and kind young man… my husband has always described him as an old and wise soul. My husband and I were in attendance at a dinner party celebration on the eve of the wedding. It was so nice to catch up on all the news and to see old friends on their happy occasion. These occasions are, in part, difficult for me, but I put on a brave face. I can’t help but recognize that my own son, Jordan, who passed away in February of 2016, will never celebrate a marriage. It is another loss I must acknowledge and accept. It is my own private torment and in no way takes away from the sincere happiness I wish for this young couple. I was grateful to have been able to participate in their celebration. As we were saying our goodbyes at the end of the evening, I had a chance to talk privately with the middle son I have always liked so much – that old and wise soul who is not yet thirty! I told him that his kids were adorable and that I was so glad to see him. He reached out to touch my arm and said, “I am so sorry about your son. He was a great guy.” I let him know how much his kind words meant to me. It has been more than 26 months since Jordan’s death and we were there to celebrate a joyous event in his family – he could have easily said nothing, and I would not have given it a second thought. Instead he chose what I am sure was uncharted territory for him. His unexpected words were a balm to my wounded heart and I was so grateful. A loved one remembered is perhaps the greatest gift we can give the bereaved.

Yes, Connor – Jordan was a great guy.... thank you for remembering.